Do (Not) Overinflate (commission)

A commission for @Firr on twitter, featuring @AuraPuffs!

“Ugh…”

Firr yawned, flipping over with the thwump of a big skunk tail slapping against a couch.

“BORED.”

Aura, currently occupied with bopping his zipper back and forth with his big plush paws, agreed. It was simply too hot to go out, too slow to stay inside; it was, naturally, a lazy, lazy summer day.

A boring summer day.

“Maybe you’ve got something in the garage?” Aura offered, gesturing towards the garage door. It would’ve been easier with thumbs, but it got the message across well enough. “Bikes or something?”

“Just bike pumps,” Firr replied off-handedly, waving a paw. “And what can you do with-“

He paused, and grinned. “Actually, yeah! Let’s go check the garage, huh?”

Aura, puzzled, pushed himself up to waddle after the suddenly-eager skunk, curious. Bike rides were fun, yeah, but… that exciting? Probably not.

Firr ducked through the door ahead of the plushie fox, giggling to himself, and there came the sound of boxes being rummaged through, a few clangs as things were thrown aside, and, curiously, a loud moo.

“C’mon in!” Firr said after a few further barnyard animal sounds, Aura’s curiosity piqued. A surprise?

“What’s the big mystery?” Aura asked, peeking through the door – just in time for a hose to be shoved directly into the plushie’s snout, a rubber band wrapping around it to secure it firmly to the fox!

“Big’s right!” Firr grinned, hefting a little black and green (it looked a bit like him, actually) bike pump, before hammering the handle down with the excitement of someone blowing up something big!

Immediately Aura’s cheeks puffed up as air rushed down the rubber hose, then… stopped, the air going somewhere else. His first thought was his tummy, but, suddenly, his footpaws comically sprung outwards, first doubling, then TRIPLING in size!

“HMPH?” The fox exclaimed in the way only someone with a hose in their mouth can, cheeks burning bright red as their handpaws quickly followed suit! They looked… different. Plastic? Not at all the usual felt and fluff the plushie was used to, as they began to feel lighter with each pump from the pump!

“What’s up, pillow-paws?” Firr teased, giving another pump to the handle. “Hose got your tongue?”

The plushfox didn’t reply, too busy focusing on their still-swelling paws and rounding tummy to pay attention. Squeaking and squirking, Aura tried to reach up towards their snout – failing, of course, as they began to grow too pressurized to bend their arms properly. Aura had almost doubled in height from those alone, wobbling as the hose started to lift past Firr’s head height, still tightly stuffed in Aura’s swelling snout!

This, of course, only compelled Firr to pump faster, a giggle escaping the skunk as Aura began to take up a good portion of the garage itself, rounding out as his arms and legs began to swell out just as his paws had.

“You’re right, the garage WAS more fun,” Firr grinned, giving the fox a few extra pumps as even their ears swelled up, zipper looking like a sprig of grass poking out of the squeaky expanse of white and orange plastic!

“MMPH!”

Aura’s back finally hit the ceiling, swelling larger, and larger, cheeks burning a bright, almost fluorescent red!

“Aaaand ta-da!” Firr proclaimed, giving the hose a tug as it popped free, rubber band unwinding itself as if it was nothing! A pressurized whoosh of air escaped from Aura’s overfilled squeaky snout for a moment, before it, too, sealed!

“I did a good job, if I say so myself,” Firr boasted, grabbing his vest with both paws and flaring it. “Now, where’s a tether…”

He spun on a heel, starting to walk deeper into the garage, and promptly planting a paw directly on a pipe.

It rolled, pitching the skunk forwards… and, perhaps in an act of karma, directly onto an air compressor’s hose.

“Mmph?” was all Firr had time to say before a nearby broom, precariously perched against a shelf, tipped over… landing directly on the “pressurize” button of the compressor.

The compressor roared to life, filling Firr’s cheeks to practically comical levels – and, completely unsurprisingly, his tummy.

It began to swell normally, as normally as the situation allowed, anyway – but, then began to bulge, the skunk’s legs being pushed aside as a new, squishy, inflatable pink mass pushed from his lower half!

Immediately blushy, Firr spared a look – now being held up by an inflatable udder!

Oh.

Oh dear.

Trying to reach for the hose, the skunk was stopped as his lower half began to swell outwards, tail shrinking down into a comically small (if still oversized) cow tail, new patterns filling in as the skunk’s usual black fur became simple black spots on white cow vinyl!

He could hear Aura snickering from across the garage as his midsection began to blow up much as his rear had, footpaws reshaping into huge, stompy rounded inflatable cow hooves, handpaws already starting to follow suit as he flailed for the hose. It was no use; he wasn’t going to reach it in time, as even his arms began to grow more rigid, legs now firmly quadrupedal.

He wasn’t even going to be an anthro parade cow?! LAME.

Trying to push himself up, he only managed to force more air out of the udder into the rest of him – shooting his usually soft and fluffy skunk snout out into a huge inflatable cow snout, hose still firmly stuck in it as little horns began to push out of his increasingly squeaky and air-filled head, ears stretching out and one gaining a nice, yellow, inflatable cow tag! (with a price, to boot)

By this point Firr was the size one would usually associate with a bounce house, taking up most of the garage Aura hadn’t already filled, the last little bits of fur falling free as his transformation finished, and popping the hose free as it became too pressurized to stay firmly in, flopping to the floor as the compressor turned off!

The parade-sized fox and cow made eye contact for a moment.

“FIRR.”

“SORRY.”

Geo’s Parade Problems (commission)

A silly post-tf commission I did for @GeoHolms!

The sun, warm, bright, came up over the mountains.

Birds chirped, lawnmowers buzzed, and, with the colossal creaking and squeaking something only the size and make of a parade balloon could make, Geo sat up from the field he’d been tethered in next to his house. It had been a weird, weird year – and, as the parade raccoon gently leaned down to wish his husband good morning, he wondered if today would get any weirder.

“Heading out?” Brighton asked, leaning against the windowsill. They looked… a little different today, for whatever reason. Shinier, maybe?

“Just into town!” The parade raccoon boomed, offering a little wave.

“Mind picking up some groceries? Oh, and helium?”

“Sure!” Geo replied, waving goodbye. “Be back later!”

The parade raccoon had already started to float away when the last request had processed. Helium?

Huh! Weird, but not any weirder than anything else that’d happened.

It had taken a while to get used to being nearly three stories tall, but, really, once you got the hang of it, it wasn’t so bad. It made sightseeing easy, for example; it also made traveling across town even easier.

Being mostly plastic and helium, Geo merely floated most of the way, gently pushing off with car-sized paws as he drifted into town. Couldn’t beat it for speed, really!

Finally, as he settled in over his usual shopping spot, the parade raccoon waved down a very, very shocked bunny employee who first noticed the vast shadow then glanced up, gazing back up at him with wide, blue eyes.

“Good morning!” Geo boomed, his voice slightly echo-y from, well, being hollow.

“G-Good morning?” The employee balked, taking a few steps back. “Can I, uh, help… you?”

“Yes, actually!” Geo grinned down at the bunny, unfurling a list the size of a mid-size sedan.

The bunny sighed. Long day today, and the shift just started.

His first errand finished, the raccoon wandered across town, mentally checking it off his list; scaring the employees of a party supply store half to death by peeking in through their skylight and picking up his order of a pallet of helium tanks and balloons, for, uh, a party, of course! No other reasons, right?

“Thanks!” Geo called down, new purchases hanging from one of his parade tethers as he drifted back to the store just in time to catch the bunny wheeling the last cart of groceries out, who swiftly darted back down the stairs inside when they spotted him.

Huh. Wonder what their problem was!

Leaving a tip, Geo swept the groceries up into his grasp, second errand done!

“And not even a single thing bumped into!” Geo exclaimed happily, huge ringtail knocking a neon sign off of a nearby building.

There was just one last errand on the day’s list – being volunteered for the local parade today!

Wait, since when had he signed up for a parade? Geo squinted at the list written on the back of one of his paws, and shrugged. Oh, well. Might as well, right?

It was actually kind of fun, letting a handler team drag the parade raccoon around town, waving at people as he drifted by. He’d come close to getting stuck between buildings a few times when the wind had picked up, but for the most part he’d had a great time!

He’d even been thanked by the mayor, a little golden star sticker being added to his huge inflatable nose.

“You’re an honorary parade guest!” The mayor had promised, giving the huge raccoon a wink. “Come back any time!”

The trip home was largely uneventful, until he’d finally reached his house… and noticed the huge, tan tail filling much of the street.

Geo dropped their groceries gently on the lawn, peeking down at the massive, squishy coyote nose currently poked out of the front door.

“Brighton?!”

“Mmph.”

“What… happened?”

“MMph?”

Geo couldn’t exactly argue with that.

Plopping down on the yard, the raccoon sighed, listening to the groaning of his inflatable husband and the poor walls he’d filled.

“We’re going to need a bigger house.”

All That Glitters (commission)

A commission for @snouttalk on twitter!

“Oh… wow.”

Arno clicked on their headlamp as they crouched through the uncovered doorway, glancing up into the yawning expanse they’d uncovered at their latest dig site. The Professor was going to be blown away by this – they’d probably get an award!

It was a vast, football field sized room; lined with Roman mosaic tiles, columns long-broken cluttering the edges. How and when this palace had been buried was a mystery to everyone involved, but the interior seemed to have held up… incredibly well. Strikingly well! It wasn’t even musty, merely… dusty. Old.

Arno clicked on their video recorder, starting to go over the architecture and construction of the palace. Easily first century construction, with scattered painted pottery and the occasional piece of jewelry drawing the dog’s eye. Could those sell?

The curious thought of how they would look in one of the necklaces struck them, though, as they finally reached the far side of the room. A large, dusty throne commanded the space, what once must’ve been fine linens and a cushion occupying the seat. Something upon it glinted in the light of the lamp, though.

A… necklace?

Curious, Arno plucked the necklace from its resting place, turning it over in their palm. Solid gold, as far as they could tell, with a green gem pressed into the pendant. Tourmaline?

Glancing around to make sure none of the other members of the dig had wandered in, Arno grinned. Might as well take a souvenir, right? Who’d miss it?

They slipped the necklace over their head, letting it rest against the fabric of their shirt…

…and froze, solid. A shock went from the tip of their tail to the top of their head, standing the poodle ramrod-straight, and, as if from thin air, a figure resolved from the dust on the throne.

Electric blue eyes stared into Arno’s golden gaze, the golden laurel the figure wore commanding a surprising amount of obedience from the frozen dog. A… rabbit?

“Well, now.” The figure spoke, resting their chin on a palm, bracing themself on the arm of the throne. “Two millennia and this is the best that wanders in?”

“Huh?” Arno managed, feeling the necklace grow heavier – tugging their gaze downwards, towards golden braces on the floor. They sparkled in the lamplight, and seemingly on autopilot they, too, were put on.

The second they were clipped on, the poodle’s mind went foggy; face drooping slightly as the intelligent focus behind it waned. They needed more jewelry. It didn’t feel complete, a compulsion striking the poodle to wear as much as possible, to show off, to serve.

“My, how obedient!” The figure on the throne chuckled, snapping their fingers together. Arno snapped to attention, intently focused on the rabbit’s paw – and, with a gesture, retrieved a small, wooden chest from beside the throne.

Arno tried to put the box back down, recognizing this wasn’t exactly the best situation to be stuck in – but their paws wouldn’t obey, walking them back to the front of the throne and sitting the box down as the Emperor commanded it, sliding it open.

Inside, cupped in soft, ancient fabric, were a pair of golden piercings, glimmering softly in the light.

The poodle fought as their paws gently plucked the piercings from their resting places, sliding their coat and shirt off as the necklace began to shift and change, whatever magic it exerted over the dog now reshaping it into a collar of sorts! The piercings soon adorned the dazed dog’s chest, chained to the collar with elaborate, fine gold links.

Their mind swam, awash with the suggestive thoughts the jewelry layered over their usual thoughts, banishing the thought of leaving at all from their mind. After all, didn’t servants serve? Who better to serve than the Emperor themself?

“It has been a long time,” The rabbit intoned, shifting into a more comfortable pose. “Fetch me my wine, would you?”

Arno didn’t even respond, merely shuffling across the ruined throne room and somehow, despite never having seen this room before, knowing exactly where it was, fetching the bottle and a cup. Wine was poured, and the poodle stood there slack, like a marionette waiting for someone to tug their strings.

There was a quiet rumble of falling rocks outside of the throne room, along with distant footsteps.

“Arno?” Someone called, a flashlight being shone into the room as someone evidently came looking for them.

The voice seemed distantly familiar, but the dog didn’t care.

“More guests? Oh, wonderful,” The rabbit grinned, a cold, calculating grin. “Show them in, would you? A court of one is no court at all.”

Arno turned, heading for the entrance – but, before they passed the first column paused.

Reaching down into a discarded box, they tugged free a few more of the odd tourmaline necklaces; evidently, once the insignia of the imperial servants themselves.

The rest of the dig site crew would look nice in them, wouldn’t they?

Some Strings Attached (commission)

A commission for @Sqrlster on twitter!

Parade Day,  the flyer read in cheery, balloonish font. Celebrating sixty years of parades, downtown! Why, you might ask, would we hold a parade for parades? Why not?

Sqrl blinked at the flyer he’d been handed, slightly confused. A parade day for parades? What kind of event was…

His internal monologue trailed off as he noticed the large, underlined “FREE FOOD” at the bottom of the flyer, and shrugged. Free food was free food, who cares if the event was weird, right?

“Hm. I’ve got a few hours, why not?” Sqrl affirmed aloud, spinning on one of his big paws to head deeper into town, towards the music he could hear!

It was a huge, bustling affair; an entire city block had been filled to the brim with crowds and booths and live music, the smell of carnival food and hissing of distant floats being filled adding to the busy surroundings in wonderfully weird ways. Sqrl sampled a little bit of everything as he wandered along, humming to the music – before he began to feel a bit… odd. Lighter on his big paws. Must just be the fun I’m having!

“Say,” One of the event staffers called, waving the squirrel over. “You look like a trustworthy sort – care to help me get the floats ready?”

Sqrl nodded enthusiastically – who didn’t like blowing up balloons?

He followed the staff member into a back tent, walking along the rear of the event towards the adjacent street the parade balloons were being filled on – all the way not noticing his paws beginning to swell, his tail’s fur starting to mat over into plastic starting with the tail tip.

The staffer seemed to notice for a moment, before the bunny shrugged and kept walking, after all – what was one more parade balloon? 

It was barely any time at all before Sqrl had started to help out, unfurling big, cartoonish animal floats from their boxes and trucks they’d been stored in since last year’s parades – even if touching them made the squirrel feel a little more odd, their fingers tingling as they finally plopped down on a surprisingly softer rear to take a quick break.

“Whew!” He sighed happily, wiping his brow. Two hours of nothing but filling balloons? Ridiculous!

“Okay!” The rabbit finally said aloud, clapping his paws together. “Just one balloon left and we’re ready to start.”

“One?” Sqrl asked, glancing around. He certainly didn’t see any, aside from the ones already drifting overhead. “Where?”

“Where?” The rabbit asked, chuckling a little. “That’s the million dollar question, isn’t it?”

As if on cue, the squirrel’s paws doubled in size.

Tripled, even!

“Huh?!”

The hissing he’d been hearing all day wasn’t far away – it was right under his nose!

Well, his belt line, too. Either way, the squirrel jumped up in surprise as his lower body suddenly began to rapidly expand, stretching his poor shorts to the breaking point as his increasingly parade-sized thighs began to strain and stretch past what they would hold – splitting down the legs and falling to the ground as the bunny staffer watched with a mixture of amusement and anticipation!

Was this why I felt so weird today?! Sqrl thought to himself, trying to press on his tummy with his handpaws as it, too, began to swell outwards – Sqrl’s big tail stretching and inflating into something more befitting a parade-sized critter than a normal squirrel, bumping into a few helium tanks he’d used earlier to fill a bunny float! They, promptly, fell to the ground hissing.

Sqrl, by now, was feeling… dizzy.

Floaty!

I… gotta get up, the squirrel lazily thought to himself, mind swimming as his shirt finally started to tear and rip, handpaws blowing up into massive, parade-sized versions of themselves as he watched, arms swelling from his armpits outwards into rounded, plastic tubes full of helium.

He didn’t want to get up, even as little hoops began to pop out of his big footpaws, ropes attaching themselves seemingly by magic! 

“How’s the last balloon coming, folks? The parade’s due to start in ten minutes!” A voice from somewhere out of view called, drawing the rabbit’s focus.

“Almost done!” The rabbit called, quickly tethering the brand new ropes to their spots on the tarmac as Sqrl began to grow larger, stretching both upwards and outwards as the curious sensation to flop over began to gnaw at their thoughts. Parade balloons didn’t stand up, did they? They were on all fours!

Dazed, Sqrl flopped over – starting to lift off of the pavement as two ropes dangled from their huge, rounded paws, quickly gathered up by the bunny and tied down, too. H-Huh… did I always have those?

The squirrel managed a glance downwards, feeling just how right it felt to drift there – and how familiar the tethers holding them down against the wind were. Of course I had those!

They looked silly; a massive, parade balloon squirrel body with a tiny, fluffy head topping it – though, as the changes crawled up their neck, even that began to shift. First to change was the squirrel’s snout, springing outwards with a loud fwoomp of filling plastic as his smile became simple detailing paint, followed by his nose! 

His eyes followed next, first freezing straight ahead, then flattening into simple, painted-on Sqrl eyes – and, finally, even his ears swelled up, his whole head filling and swelling until it, too, was parade-sized!

B-But… squeak?

Sqrl’s thoughts were scattered, bouncing around inside his empty helium-filled head – until, finally, they stopped as the tanks ran dry; just another parade balloon for the Parade Day festivities!

The bunny cheered, clapping his paws together as he called a handler crew over.

“C’mon, let’s get started!”

The bunny tugged on their cap, grinning up at the huge inflatable squirrel’s face. “It’s time for a parade!”